This year I started a mentoring relationship with one of my small group guys. He was the one who had decided he wanted us to continue our relationship even after he moved on from my small group, so we have talked multiple times about what that looks like. Today that conversation changed course a bit.
A friend of mine who mentors many godly men told me that mentoring needs to be wanted more by the protégé than the mentor. The protégé should always be the one to ask the potential mentor if he would be willing to be a mentor in the protégé’s life, and this type of question will fuel future interactions.
Along those lines, I wanted to make sure my student knows how communication is going to work in our relationship going forward. He has a history of coming to me with a problem, me giving him a solution that involves regular communication, him following through with it for the first 2 or 3 days, then not hearing about it from him anymore. Today I told him that this type of communication can’t happen if he wants a mentoring relationship.
He has to be the one to initiate conversation. He should be the one checking in with me when he has temptations and needs extra prayer. He should be the one to start a discussion about a piece of advice he needs. Why? Because he needs to want this more than I do.
Question: Are the people you mentor taking initiative or letting you do all the work?