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Rewarding Days Make The Unproductive Days Worth It

April 18, 2013 by Leave a Comment

Every now and then you have a day in student ministry when you know you just had a powerful positive effect on a student’s life. Those are the days that make what we do so rewarding. These are also the days we should remember when we have a day were you feel you’re just beating your head against the wall.

One of the things I need to remind myself is that what we do in student ministry, whether you’re a paid staff member at a church or a volunteer, is all on God’s timing. He knows just the right time for a student to really hear what you’re saying and for it to sink in. God knows when they are ready to hear and act on the advice or the lesson we’re teaching. Sometimes God’s timing and mine are on different schedules. I have to remind myself that his time table is the one that matters not mine.

I often judge how good my student small group was by a couple of things. First, how much discussion was there? I don’t want to be the one doing all of the talking. If you’re doing more than about 25% of the talking you’re preaching not teaching. Second, I judge how the night went based by the number of text messages I get from my group after the group is over. Last night I must have gotten them all thinking about some things because my cell phone lit up with text messages from my guys for about an hour. And while I love that they confide in me, I want them to bring it up to the small group too. I reinforce that they have a group of brothers that are there to help them, and probably most of them have the same struggles so your input will help others too.

I’m going to end this post by stealing a Twitter post from Steven today:

Youth ministry is often messy, sometimes heartbreaking, usually crazy, generally joyful, seldom easy, never boring, always fulfilling.

Filed Under: Cool stuff, Small Groups, Youth Ministry Tagged With: , , ,

Distractions

May 31, 2012 by Leave a Comment

One of the things I’ve learned over the past few years as a student small group leader is that distractions during small group time can be, well, distracting. Sometimes it’s not a big deal but I’ve had times where one guy was sharing something really heavy, some problem or issue and then another student who got to the meeting late, or a cell phone ringing with a call or text message just totally kills the moment. It breaks the stride of the person talking and it can ruin the moment or totally take the punch out of some killer Bible scripture.

There are several ways to keep distractions to a minimum and I realize that sometimes distractions are unavoidable. If you’re meeting in a host home you may have to deal with dogs barking and phones ringing. Most host home parents are sympathetic to your cause and will do their best to keep household distractions to a minimum during your small group time. If it becomes a problem you should not hesitate to approach them and ask if they can help you out with keeping noise and distractions to a minimum.

Students coming in late can be a big distraction. My group is a very close-knit group, so when one of them comes in late it usually involves everyone hugging everyone. I love that they are really close, but I hate the two-minute distraction and everyone losing their place and the momentum of the study. If I know one of them is running late I usually won’t start the meeting until everyone is in place.

I used to take cell phones and put them in a box during the meeting. This year I had seniors who were really good at not using cell phones so at about the halfway point of the year I didn’t make them put their cell phones in a box. But I made it clear that if it became a problem we would go back to that. It never did become a problem.

Sometimes I had to discipline myself, it can sometimes become easy for the discussion to wander off of topic. As the leader you need to get the discussion back on topic.

Question: Do you have any tricks to keeping distractions to a minimum?

Filed Under: Small Groups, Youth Ministry Tagged With: , , , ,

Teaching Students That God’s Love Is Unconditional

February 14, 2012 by Leave a Comment

Last night I got a text from one of my students asking for some advice. I love getting these texts because of the wide range of problems they are dealing with. Usually God gives me the answer and somehow it grows me at the same time. It’s usually either parent problems, girl problems or just advice on how to handle a situation. Whenever I get one of these I try to use scripture somewhere in my text back to them. I want them to get to the point where they not only seek out advice of friends and leaders but also from the Bible…what does God have to say about what they are going through.

Here’s the text I got last night:

“I have a job interview tomorrow and I know I need to pray about it, but I’ve made some bad decisions lately and it’s been a while since I’ve asked for forgiveness. I feel guilty asking for it now; it looks like I’m only asking for forgiveness because I need God to help me with this interview.”

I answered back and told him that here is the cool thing about God…He doesn’t care why you came back to him, he just cares that you came back. God’s love for us is unconditional. He doesn’t get mad at us but he does get sad and disappointed when we turn from Him. When you recognize that’s happened that’s when you turn back towards Him. Man gets spiteful and mad, God does not. Man will hold a grudge against us, God does not.

Here’s the last part of the advice I gave him: if you don’t get the job it’s not because God is getting back at you, it’s because this might not be the job for you at this time, and it does not serve God’s purpose for you. I reminded him of Jeremiah 29:11 – For I know the plans I have for you,” says the LORD. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope. –NLT

This was also a good reminder for me, and this makes a good lesson for students. Sometimes man’s love is conditional, God’s love is NEVER conditional.

 

Filed Under: Encouragement, Youth Ministry Tagged With: , , , ,